Gametes In Love

Meet Rose. She’s our Elf. Yes, this is an “Elf on the Shelf”. No, she does not go to the North Pole to creepily report on the behavior status of the kids to Santa. I, quite honestly, have been jealous seeing other parents do kooky things with dolls, and wanted to join in the fun. I just had to think of an alternative purpose for an elf in our home. So our Rose helps people, because that’s what elves do. She goes out at night and helps out people in need. She comes home in the early morning.

G decided that our elf should be a girl, and he got to name her. He proposed two other names: the first I forget (because it was non-sensical, but I’m sure it contained the word “poop”), and the second was Tree. We were talking about our incoming new friend on our way home and G said “No! I have an even better idea! Let’s call her Rose”. Old school; I have no idea how he came up with it, but Rose it is.

Today, Rose was discovered taking a bath in a bowl of cereal.

I just didn’t have the heart to pour milk on our brand new Elf, but G thought it was awesome just the same.

Tomorrow, the kids will wake to discover Rose fishing in the bathroom sink. Man, how do I wish we were a family that ate Goldfish right now! Annie’s bunnies will have to do. So just pretend, OK?

G is still REALLY hard to get to wake up in the morning. Today S helped him get dressed and ready, but then as all of us were trying to get shoes on, I went up to G’s bedroom, to see him face down on his mattress, trying to get back to sleep. I prompted him to come down and see how silly Rose was being. He immediately perked up and went on down. I’m hopeful this will be a continuing trend, because if it helps me get out of the house on time, Rose will be my new best friend. Forget blackmail into good behavior: I’ll take this, instead!

I now reserve the right to spam my social network feed with daily elf photos. ‘Cuz really, let’s be honest: this is for ME to have fun. BUAHAHAHAHA!

ETA: G got up this morning and the very first thing out of his mouth was about Rose and asking what she was up to. He got dressed fast, with no objection and then was excited to go on a hunt for her. Score!!!! Oh, and here’s some video:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTLjJMHjiEs]

If you hear this off the top of the lungs of a two year old, more specifically OUR two-year old, let me translate:– “I want snowman!” (aka “I want to listen to Frostie the Snowman”)

Wee peanut is obsessed with that song for some reason, and I haven’t successfully been able to explain to him that while our radio station WILL play holiday music 24/7 for the next few weeks, Frostie will NOT be on an endless loop. Which is why instantly following you hear:

– No Shumann!

Yep, kid, I know it’s not what you want to hear. G and I tried singing it to him, except that I only know the opening verse. Like any other self-respecting parent I proceeded to add “Something, something, something” as stand-in lyrics to the melody of the song. But my monkeys are too smart, and G called me out on it, pointing out that “That’s not how it goes!”

Apparently I need to study up.

Last night I totally earned my Mean Mommy moniker. I’ve been working with the kids on picking up their toys at the end of the day before bed-time. Some days have been successful, some not. S2 for the most part will just do whatever G is doing, so it’s kind of important, you see for G to kick off the cleaning.

My latest approach is giving the monkeys 10 minutes to get their toys off the floor. The majority of toys have a home, although the rest will placate me if they are just off the floor. Anything left on the floor after the 10 min period, goes to time out for 3 days.  G knows this consequence, and can recite it by heart. After last night, be may know it a bit too well.

We’ve only had to do this 3 times, mind you. We’re still at the onset of this process.

Last night, when the 10 min counter started, G decided he wanted to race instead. S and I patiently let the clock run out, although we demonstratively brought down a laundry basket to collect our loot. 10 min ran out, and the toys were pulled off the floor. Including 4 lovies. 1 belonging to G, 3 to S2. S2 doesn’t care all that much, but for G it was like cutting off a limb. While he has 7, he insists on sleeping with ALL of them (well, all except for Long Tag). Nubsie is now in the garage ‘till Wednesday. There were tears. Oh there were tears. He was such a sad, pitiful sight. My heart physically ached for him, and I really wanted to go to the garage and get him his Nubsie with a promise he’ll clean up when asked next time. But we had to hold our guns and not give in. So Nubsie is exiled until Wednesday evening. I’m sure there will be lots of rejoicing when he returns. Until then, this is Mean Mommy, signing off.

… today, also known as Science Sunday, because we took the kids to the Agu Exploration Station at Moscone Center yesterday. We got to build stomp rockets (and launch them), G designed his first robot, make & eat solar cookies, and prep our exploding volcanoes. We’re saving the volcanoes for some home action.

Here’s G and his robot. Doesn’t it rock? S assures me G designed it on his own. Now I’m on a hunt for mini motors and brushes so we can do these at home. Someone’s going to have to solder the wires though, since the motors come sans wiring. Hmn, humn — G-pa?????

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dzr29kfFNmE]

and S2 launching rockets:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gdt3cO7DDvA]

Trust me — this thing flies pretty good if you apply a bit more than 28lb of stomping on it.

Blankets are in Stormese called “binkits”, thanks to Sandra Boyton.

He calls his toes piggies, which may be one of the cutest things ever. Likely this is because of the “This little piggie” rhyme, but who cares.

In the mornings, when we get dressed, I blow on his feet. If I only do one foot, he immediately gives me his other for equal lovin’.

Sometimes, when he’s getting changed, he’ll stick his feet up waving them around my face. I’ll pretend this toes are smelly (ok — sometimes they really ARE smelly) and he finds this hilarious.